Thirty-three months. We've been parents for thirty-three months. I've had a streak going for thirty-three months, and today.... Well. Today it ended.
Miss B and SD always get their bath in the mornings. She's not a fan of the hairdryer and I hate to send her to bed with wet hair. Since we have that flexibility, this works for us.
Tonight at dinner, SD put chicken noodle soup in his hair AND placed his bowl of yogurt on his head as a hat. Miss B's face and arms were covered in Nutella and Cheetos. (Yeah, don't ask about the eclectic nature or nutritional value of dinner- the both had awesome, healthy lunches and The Hubs wasn't here tonight, so sometimes it just goes that way....) SO, while they were both finishing up their dinners, I ran the water and into the tub they went! I didn't really get a chance to prep, like I usually do- towels at the ready & clothes set out in Miss B's room (which is where we all go after a bath.) SO, I grabbed a basket of clean laundry, brought it into the bathroom, and was digging around finding onsies and pjs. Miss B said something, I walked over to the tub, and saw it.
TURD IN THE TUB!!!!
I acted with the efficiency and decisiveness of a Navy Seal. Turd scooped out and into the toilet (luckily it was SD- the always constipated one- so it was easily scooped!) both kids hauled out of the tub, washclothes thrown into the laundry, tub drained, quickly wiped down, new water run (they're faces/hair were not clean at all yet!) kids back in, new washclothes, toys scrubbed in the sink!
(AND he had the nerve to poop more, right there on the bathmat while waiting for the new water to run in the tub! Luckily I caught it with some toilet paper- skillz, I haz them!- wiped his bum, and back in the tub he went. I'm just glad he finished before he got plunked back into the tub!)
The rest of bathtime/bedtime went off without a hitch. They're both in bed (not necessarily snoozing yet, but I'm not worried about that...) and it's before 9pm. And The Hubs is not even home yet!
That's me- in times of emergency/dire circumstances, I am the calm, collected one. I can be counted on when kids are puking, fingers get smashed in doors... or if there's a turd in the tub.